These two excerpts from Alfie Kohn’s book Unconditional Parenting are great advice for any parent:

To treat children respectfully means making an effort to avoid doing these things [these things: sarcasm, sounding snide, dismiss feelings, interrupting, trivialize fears] but it also means realizing that children are more knowledgeable about some matters than we are--and I don't just mean that they know which dinosaurs were meat-eaters.  Thomas Gordon said it well:  "Children sometimes know better than parents when they are sleepy or hungry; know better the qualities of their friends, their own aspirations and goals, how their various teachers treat them; know better the urges and needs within their bodies, whom they love and whom they don't, what they value and what they don't."  In any case, we can't always assume that because we're more mature we necessarily have more insight into our children than they have into themselves. ( Kohn, p.125)

and

To focus on children's needs, and to work with them to make sure their needs are met, constitutes a commitment to taking children seriously.  It means treating them as people whose feelings and desires and questions matter.  A child's preferences can't always be accommodated, but they can always be considered and they need never be dismissed out of hand.  It's important to see a child as someone with a unique point of view, with very real fears and concerns (often quite different from our own), and with distinctive way to reasoning (which is not merely "cute"). (Kohn, p.119)

From Alfie Kohn’s website www.alfiekohn.com:

Traditional Parenting doesn’t work but what does?

This Q&A from Alfie Kohn’s  website addresses some common questions about his book and his approach to parenting.

Q. Aren't there enough parenting books on the market already?

A. Well, yes and no. I think you're right that there are more than enough guides whose purpose is to get kids to do whatever they're told. Most parenting books and articles are filled with techniques designed to produce mindless obedience in children. But the authors very rarely ask parents to rethink their basic assumptions, or to consider how these techniques for changing behavior - you know, for getting kids to stop being rude or start using the potty, or whatever - might actually get in the way of our long-term goals, like wanting our children to grow into responsible, caring, happy people. There aren't nearly enough books that encourage parents to ask what their kids need - and how to meet those needs. Also, in my opinion, there aren't enough books for general readers that look at what research says about these issues.

Q. All right, let's start with that last part, then. What does the research say?

A. First of all, it says that the question isn't whether we love our children, but how we love them. Specifically, what matters is whether we love them unconditionally. They shouldn't have to earn our approval. Kids need us to love them for who they are, not for what they do. Our affections, in other words, shouldn't depend on their being well behaved, or getting good grades, or doing well at sports, or anything else. Unconditional love from parents is what allows kids to accept themselves as fundamentally good people, even when they screw up or fall short.

Q. But don't you think most parents would say they already love their kids unconditionally?

A. Sure. But what matters is whether the kids themselves feel loved in that way. Often they don't, particularly if we punish them for being bad - such as by using what psychologists call "love withdrawal" techniques, like time-out. Same thing if we reward or praise them, giving them what amounts to a doggie biscuit for pleasing us. Neither threats nor bribes work very well, you know, especially over the long haul. At best, they produce only temporary obedience. And in the process they do a lot of harm -- for example, by teaching children that they have to jump through hoops for us to love them. Some kids become anxious as a result, some depressed, some angry. Some stop looking to us for guidance and don't spend time with us when they're old enough to have a choice. Some feel they have to pretend to be someone they're not, so their parents will love them --

Q. Wait a minute. Aren't you criticizing the kind of discipline that most of us use all the time?

A. You bet. But let me immediately make it clear that if we've been relying on strategies that backfire, it's not because we're stupid or because we don't care about our kids. In fact, I spend a whole chapter explaining how we're "conditioned to be conditional" - that is, why we keep falling into the trap of using bribes and threats even though they don't really help, and even though most of us, as ex-kids, know from the other side how it feels to be treated that way. Yet sometimes we see ourselves doing, and hear ourselves saying, the exact same things that we were on the receiving end of, once upon a time - which is what I call "How did my mother get into my larynx?"

You know, parents often say to me: "I've used time-outs, I've taken away privileges, I've praised them when they're good, I've done all the things the books tell me to do, but none of it works." What I'm trying to do in Unconditional Parenting is help these folks understand that those techniques, which are indeed the staples of conventional discipline, are actually part of the problem! The trouble isn't with your kids; it's with what you've been talked into doing to your kids.

Q. So what are you proposing instead? Do we need to be more permissive? Because, you know, a lot of people think that parents are too permissive as it is, and that kids could, quite frankly, use a little more control.

A. Let me answer that in two ways. First of all, the real problem today isn't permissiveness. It's the fear of permissiveness. We're so afraid of spoiling our kids that we err in the opposite direction. I mean, sure, I've been annoyed by screaming children in restaurants whose parents don't lift a finger to intervene, but for every example like that, there are hundreds of examples of children who are restricted unnecessarily, yelled at, threatened -- basically bullied by their parents. Spend some time at a playground or a birthday party, you'll see what I mean. The real parenting epidemic in our society is the tendency to overcontrol children. And, by the way, liberal, educated parents tend to use techniques that are less crude but no less controlling.

My second point, though, is that I'm not arguing for more permissiveness. Kids don't need us to back off and let them do whatever the hell they want, any more than they need us to control them. That's a false dichotomy, and I reject both options. The real alternative to doing things to kids is to work with them.

Q. And your book shows us how?

A. The second half is brimming with concrete suggestions, which are organized around three central ideas: how to help kids feel unconditionally loved even when we have to say no to them; how to get in the habit of imagining the way what we say and do appears from the child's point of view; and how to give kids more opportunities to make choices. Because, after all, children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions.

I like to think of the book as both practical and idealistic because it offers strategies for helping kids to grow into psychologically healthy people, not just for getting them to do what they're told. I think we all need to become more mindful of what we're doing, and its long-range implications for our children's development, rather than just operating on autoparent. I guess you could say my goal is to inspire the reader to become a better parent by building on what he or she already cares about.

Q. If you don't mind my asking, are you a parent?

A. I am. I have a 9-year-old daughter and a 5-year-old son, and my book contains plenty of stories about them. In fact, my thinking about these topics has been influenced by being a Dad as much as by all the studies I've analyzed. Fortunately, real-life experience and scientific data tend to point in the same direction, that is, toward "working with" strategies, unconditional parenting, and --

Q. And your kids don't test limits?

A. Well, if you're asking whether there have been days I've run out of patience, the answer is, Of course! But, you know, I have my doubts about that phrase "testing limits." It's often used as a justification for parents to punish - that is, to make kids suffer in order to teach them a lesson. I suspect that, by misbehaving, what children are really testing is the unconditionality of our love. My hunch is that they're acting in unacceptable ways to see if, at some point, we'll stop accepting them. And we have to reassure them: No matter what you do, no matter how frustrated I get, I will never, never, never stop loving you. Of course, at the same time, we have to teach, explain, provide guidance, set a good example, solve problems together, and all that other good stuff.

Q. Tell me more about when you run out of patience.

A. You mean, with my own kids?

Q. Right.

A. Well, one time I remember I bought tickets for a local children's theater production of The Wizard of Oz so I could take my daughter, who was wild about the movie. The day before the show, she threw a world-class temper tantrum about something and, I've got to tell you, I came this close to threatening her with not going to see the play unless her behavior improved. I had to remind myself that if I gave in to that temptation I'd have been using the outing as an instrument of control rather than as an expression of love. We can't have it both ways.

Q. Interesting. And, since your book draws on research as well as experience, how about describing one study for us, to go with your story?

A. OK, here's one I thought was interesting. It's based on the premise that, even though kids don't always gravitate to the healthiest foods, they do, even as babies, tend to consume as much food as they need. They may eat very little one day but then make up for it the next. Or, rather, they do that unless we try to run their bodies for them. Two nutritionists found that parents who try to make their children eat only during mealtimes (rather than when they're hungry), or who encourage them to clean their plates (even when they obviously aren't hungry), or who use dessert as a reward tend to wind up with kids who lose the natural ability to regulate their caloric intake. You see what I mean? When the parents are overcontrolling, the children stop trusting their bodies' cues. What's true of food, by the way, is true of other things, too, like ethics: Too much control by us means too little opportunity for them to develop internal regulation.

Q. So you've written … what? The anti-discipline book?

A. Um, I don't know if I'd put it that way. It's not just about discipline - it's about the ways we think about, feel about, and act with our kids. I'm trying to invite readers to question their most basic assumptions about raising children, to reconnect to their own best instincts. And I want to offer them practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" parenting to "working with" parenting - including how to replace conditional-love practices like positive reinforcement with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people.

We hope you have enjoyed learning more about unconditional parenting. In the next month, we will be bringing you more interviews from parenting and outdoor family experts.

Here is a link to our Outdoorbaby.net Q and A with Alfie Kohn.

Heidi Ahrens

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Recently, I may have had enough local experiences to change my mind.  (Don’t worry New York, I still love you and plan on living with you again one day, but I found another friend called the Roaring Fork Valley to keep me happy for now).

A month after Ramona was born, I went to the local community pool.  I was thinking of watching my husband Erik and Cora swim in the pool, while I took care of my little infant.  But, since we live in a small town, we ran into a student of my husband’s at the pool.  It was so great to be able to ask Duncan to hold my little daughter for fifteen minutes as I splashed around with my family.  It was great to give Cora the opportunity to play with me.  She yelled out in excitement when she saw me enter the water.  She wanted to swim to me, float with me.  Her maman was all hers for a little bit.

Recently, we had to go and get passport photos and submit the paper work.  It was so great to go to the local photographer, notary and post office and have them be so accommodating to my children sleeping in the car.  The whole family is supposed to be present during all these steps --  something that is very hard to do with a toddler and a newborn, since the whole process takes more than six hours.  Every official involved allowed us adults to come in separately and then to bring in our sleeping children quickly.  In New York, there is no way that the post office or a notary or a governmental agency would allow you to do such a thing.  Not only is the wait hours long, but the offices are often buried deep within big buildings.

As I write this, I am sitting in a restaurant in Snowmass Village, called The Stew Pot. They are letting me sit here while I write and take up one of their tables.  They are busy but they are accommodating.  They know that I can’t stand in the cold for hours while Cora finishes her ski lesson and that there is no other place to go, since I would have to spend more money to hang out.

So here I sit, while I know that Cora is safe and having fun somewhere on the hill with her ski coach, who also happens to be her swimming instructor.  Small town, large perks.  No need to talk to a new face and explain all of Cora’s eccentricities, her diet and her needs.

I could go on and on about the wonders of living in a small town.  Like Cora’s first day of school, when I got a phone call from a friend letting me know she saw Cora happily playing with her teacher in town.  Or those times when I forget money and can leave the bakery or the hairdresser and return to pay later.

 Heidi Ahrens

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1.       Tools:  Bring paper and pen with you and have your child draw and represent different things they see.  If your children are older, have them free write or journal about how they feel about a certain place or have them list what they see.  If you have a very young child let them be inspired by the landscape (indoors or out) . Other tools: binoculars, guide books, paints, magnifying glass.

2.      Vantage point:  Get down on your knees, climb a tree, go on the roof of a building, lie down. Change vantage points with your child and see how the observations change

3.      Time:  Give it time.  Practice this with your child in different environments, but also set a certain amount of time and sit silently before you start to talk or share your observations.

4.      Questions: Ask your child questions:  What do you see?  Where have you seen this before?  How does this environment make you feel?  What colors do you notice?  Have you heard any new sounds?  Did you notice any textures? Can you make a connection between this place and Blank (insert a place that your child likes or dislikes)  Do you think this is a wild place? Why?  How many natural objects do you see?  Man made?  Show me all the shapes you can find.  If you were to taste this place what would it taste like?  What is missing?

5.      Share:  Once back at home have your child share their findings with another adult by verbalizing, creating movements or painting about what they observed.

You will soon be on your way to opening your child’s mind and perception of what is considered a wild place, an outdoor space, a natural space.  Have them be their own guide in seeing what is truly out there.

Heidi

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As I got larger and larger and less mobile during my last pregnancy, I struggled with the idea that our summer was wasting away with very little outdoor adventures.  This is when Cora, three years old, gave me a great idea.  As we passed by a fire pit on one of our mini toddler hikes, she mentioned that it would be fun to cook a meal.

This is how our summer hot dog roasting outings started. OK, we don’t eat hot dogs, but we brought juicy bratwurst-like sausages and fixings for hot chocolate. We would pack the car with all our needs for a day at a campsite, drive to a beautiful national campground and spend the day walking around, exploring rivers, and then cooking a meal on a fire.  A few times we packed our things in a backpack and hiked on a trail for a while then set up camp for the day.

After Ramona was born, we found that this was also an easy way to head into the wilderness without taking the extra steps that camping would require.  We would also bring Cora’s paints, sand castle making kit and her bike.  It was wonderful to sit around a fire and have her play around us in the sunshine, while I nursed Ramona and she would fall asleep on me.

Then my father visited at the end of September to help out when Erik was gone for a week.  We once again headed down a trail with our supplies.  Since, my father has bad knees he no longer can go on long hikes.  It was the perfect way to share one of our favorite family activities (spending time in the outdoors) with my father.  I was so grateful that Cora got to see her grandfather cooking around an open pit wilderness area fire and that her grandfather could see her in all her glory in such a setting.  Of course, Ramona came along for the day and she got to observe the light coming through the branches above her resting place, while taking in the sounds and smell of the forest.

A few suggestions:  Bring long skewers or a grilling basket, something to sit on and extra layers in case the weather changes, and a lighter too.   Keep it simple.  We would bring carrots and a few other no fuss snacks and we could just relax as a family.  Always, bring plenty of water and some shade for the baby and sunscreen for the older folks.

Heidi

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As I got larger and larger and less mobile during my last pregnancy, I struggled with the idea that our summer was wasting away with very little outdoor adventures.  This is when Cora, three years old, gave me a great idea.  As we passed by a fire pit on one of our mini toddler hikes, she mentioned that it would be fun to cook a meal.

This is how our summer hot dog roasting outings started. OK, we don’t eat hot dogs, but we brought juicy bratwurst-like sausages and fixings for hot chocolate. We would pack the car with all our needs for a day at a campsite, drive to a beautiful national campground and spend the day walking around, exploring rivers, and then cooking a meal on a fire.  A few times we packed our things in a backpack and hiked on a trail for a while then set up camp for the day.

After Ramona was born, we found that this was also an easy way to head into the wilderness without taking the extra steps that camping would require.  We would also bring Cora’s paints, sand castle making kit and her bike.  It was wonderful to sit around a fire and have her play around us in the sunshine, while I nursed Ramona and she would fall asleep on me.

Then my father visited at the end of September to help out when Erik was gone for a week.  We once again headed down a trail with our supplies.  Since, my father has bad knees he no longer can go on long hikes.  It was the perfect way to share one of our favorite family activities (spending time in the outdoors) with my father.  I was so grateful that Cora got to see her grandfather cooking around an open pit wilderness area fire and that her grandfather could see her in all her glory in such a setting.  Of course, Ramona came along for the day and she got to observe the light coming through the branches above her resting place, while taking in the sounds and smell of the forest.

A few suggestions:  Bring long skewers or a grilling basket, something to sit on and extra layers in case the weather changes, and a lighter too.   Keep it simple.  We would bring carrots and a few other no fuss snacks and we could just relax as a family.  Always, bring plenty of water and some shade for the baby and sunscreen for the older folks.

Heidi

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Inspired by a food column that appeared in the New York Times Magazine about six months ago ( I tried to find a link to it but could not) I have tried to put the REAL STORY of eating meat in the context of the pigs lives; a.k.a no cute curly tails but “Look at your pork chop, honey”.

We visit the pigs, we give them table scraps and look at them walking around in the mud, eating while standing in their slop bucket and we comment on how great they will taste on sustainability dinner night.

One day at lunch, the school gardener and ranch hand were talking about loading the pigs onto the trailer.  My daughter has questions.  Now, she tells people:  “The pigs went on a trailer to Peonia, to get killed and we ate them.”  Not bad, don’t your think, for a REAL Story.

Now some of you may not think that it is correct, maybe even cruel, for a little girl of three  to talk about death or to realize that meat is a face looking at you from your plate, but I want her to know.  If she wants to stop eating meat tomorrow then she will know why.

She has witnessed the death of our dog and her burial.  When our second daughter was born in July, the first person she saw was my three year old.

I hope my daughters grow up with a better understanding or peace when it comes to what they eat, what life and death is, and how love does not come in curly little tails or furry packages, but more in the relationship and consciousness we bring to our actions.

But then there is a piece of the puzzle that is missing and that maybe makes this whole story null and void. The idea of slaughtering an animal myself or of going hunting (don’t get me started on the subject of guns) makes me sick and very uncomfortable.  There goes my try at being REAL.

Oink, oink  What is on your plate?

Heidi

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While my husband has been out of town I've been responsible for two boys, two dogs, two jobs, one house and an inordinate amount of laundry.

Walking two dogs with a stroller is too much for me. We hardly fit on the sidewalk. Hiking on a trail doesn't really work because I never know when Anders (2.5) will hit the wall and "need" to be carried. It could be a couple miles into a walk or it could be a few minutes after we hit the trail. Carrying him and his one-year-old brother is out of the question. I'm tough and all, but two kids is too many to carry.

I've been trying to come up with ways I can get all four boys outside, exercised and having fun. Last weekend I took them to a place I don't normally think of as a recreational/dog walking/kid entertaining place.

A closed campground.

We are lucky to have several campgrounds less than 30 minutes from our house. We hit up a Forest Service campground (Pine Creek Campground) after it had closed for the season. No one was there, so the dogs could run amok and the roads were perfect for pushing a stroller.

Turned out that Finn fell asleep in the truck just before we got there, so I left him in there. Anders and I found plenty to do within sight of the truck.

It wasn't exactly a wilderness experience, but there were trees, snow, shrubs and, most importantly, sticks. (Do all kids LOVE sticks and rocks, or is that a boy thing?).

Anders played in the campfire ring, stirred snow and chased the dogs. The dogs ran around willy nilly without bugging anyone, Finn slept and I could check a couple things off my to-do list: run dogs, get kids outside.

Where do you take your kids to connect with nature that's a little outside the box?

by Melynda @ www.yourwildchild.com

While my husband has been out of town I've been responsible for two boys, two dogs, two jobs, one house and an inordinate amount of laundry.

Walking two dogs with a stroller is too much for me. We hardly fit on the sidewalk. Hiking on a trail doesn't really work because I never know when Anders (2.5) will hit the wall and "need" to be carried. It could be a couple miles into a walk or it could be a few minutes after we hit the trail. Carrying him and his one-year-old brother is out of the question. I'm tough and all, but two kids is too many to carry.

I've been trying to come up with ways I can get all four boys outside, exercised and having fun. Last weekend I took them to a place I don't normally think of as a recreational/dog walking/kid entertaining place.

A closed campground.

We are lucky to have several campgrounds less than 30 minutes from our house. We hit up a Forest Service campground (Pine Creek Campground) after it had closed for the season. No one was there, so the dogs could run amok and the roads were perfect for pushing a stroller.

Turned out that Finn fell asleep in the truck just before we got there, so I left him in there. Anders and I found plenty to do within sight of the truck.

It wasn't exactly a wilderness experience, but there were trees, snow, shrubs and, most importantly, sticks. (Do all kids LOVE sticks and rocks, or is that a boy thing?).

Anders played in the campfire ring, stirred snow and chased the dogs. The dogs ran around willy nilly without bugging anyone, Finn slept and I could check a couple things off my to-do list: run dogs, get kids outside.

Where do you take your kids to connect with nature that's a little outside the box?

by Melynda @ www.yourwildchild.com

While my husband has been out of town I've been responsible for two boys, two dogs, two jobs, one house and an inordinate amount of laundry.

Walking two dogs with a stroller is too much for me. We hardly fit on the sidewalk. Hiking on a trail doesn't really work because I never know when Anders (2.5) will hit the wall and "need" to be carried. It could be a couple miles into a walk or it could be a few minutes after we hit the trail. Carrying him and his one-year-old brother is out of the question. I'm tough and all, but two kids is too many to carry.

I've been trying to come up with ways I can get all four boys outside, exercised and having fun. Last weekend I took them to a place I don't normally think of as a recreational/dog walking/kid entertaining place.

A closed campground.

We are lucky to have several campgrounds less than 30 minutes from our house. We hit up a Forest Service campground (Pine Creek Campground) after it had closed for the season. No one was there, so the dogs could run amok and the roads were perfect for pushing a stroller.

Turned out that Finn fell asleep in the truck just before we got there, so I left him in there. Anders and I found plenty to do within sight of the truck.

It wasn't exactly a wilderness experience, but there were trees, snow, shrubs and, most importantly, sticks. (Do all kids LOVE sticks and rocks, or is that a boy thing?).

Anders played in the campfire ring, stirred snow and chased the dogs. The dogs ran around willy nilly without bugging anyone, Finn slept and I could check a couple things off my to-do list: run dogs, get kids outside.

Where do you take your kids to connect with nature that's a little outside the box?

by Melynda @ www.yourwildchild.com

I am sure that when you pack up for your ‘big’ hiking day with your toddlers, you don’t think of rest stops as a top choice destination.  Also, if you talk to other friends about your child’s nature discoveries you talk about your kids ‘agro’ rock scrambles, epic days, and gnarly adventures.  Yeah, I know our kids have to either match or beat their parents hard core abilities these days.  So what do you do when your child makes their biggest outdoor discovery at a rest stop?

Well, I say go for it.  Get down on your knees and love that rest stop rock.

My daughter, Cora’s rest stop fascinations are important enough to make it onto this outdoor blog. Why?  Because it is so important to meet your children where they are and to celebrate their curiosity regardless of where they may encounter beauty.

A few weeks ago, I went on a hike (Red Hill) with a friend who has two toddlers.  Her children ran up the hill with much excitement and discovered many sticks, rocks and overlooks to be fascinated with.  MY DAUGHTER, MY OUTDOOR BABY, THE INSPIRATION FOR THIS SITE, whined the whole time, only imitated her friends and was very happy when we sat down to eat a snack, AND THE OTHER MOM HAD BROUGHT SOME GOOD SNACKS, unlike myself. When we left the friends because Cora needed to go for her nap, she shuffled her feet and said it was too hard, that her feet hurt, that she wanted to be carried.

But, THE BEAUTY AND VAST INTEREST OF GLENWOOD CANYON REST STOPS never fails.  Every time we go to Denver, we need to stop in the canyon.  Most times we spend about an hour exploring the side of the river, the small stream that comes to join the Colorado River.  We up turn rocks to find critters, we get lost on the shore of the river playing imaginary games in the grasses and bushes.  Many times we take off our shoes and test out the temperature of the water, look through the sand and mud and we end our time doing a few leaps and bounds in the grass.

Yes, the outdoors is everywhere and beauty is everywhere.  Just ask Cora; she will tell you the best outdoor destination is a highway rest stop.

Heidi

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 If you are one of the families who visit this site looking for ideas on how to best introduce your children to the wonders of playing outdoors, you can rest assured that you don’t have to go on wild backcountry adventures to have your children start to be nature lovers.

How about if you start by visiting your local park on a weekly basis?  Going to a playground can be a wonderful way to have your child get comfortable with the outdoors.  I know that some of you may think of a playground as more of an organized play space, but it does offer some families a wonderful environment for outdoor discovery. I have taught many high schoolers who were not comfortable sitting on sand or on grass.

Local parks often have patches of grass.  Think of having your children sit down, roll around and look at the different blades of grass. I am sure they will see different characteristics, and they may even find a few critters.  Have them talk about how it feels to touch the grass, they can describe the texture and compare it to the feeling of wood or concrete.

Also, playing in sand; sifting it through fingers, pouring from one container into another, adding water and so on can be a starting point for children to begin learning about nature.

Go on a little walk around the perimeter of the park and have the child describe the trees, listen for different sounds like the wind in the leaves, the laughter of children.  Have them look up: does it look different than around their house or apartment building?

Parks are a very good first step in having children become comfortable outdoors.

Heidi

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A few months ago my daughter was invited to a birthday party at a local playground.  The birthday girl was turning three and she was able to play with all her friends beside the beautiful Crystal River in Redstone, CO.  What a great way to celebrate your birthday!

The children played on the playground equipment, but they also went on a rock scavenger hunt, played on the river bank and ran around the grass.

Inviting children to a party outdoors is a great way to have children who don’t know each other play, while minimizing shyness and hyper-activity.  The parents get more of a break as well, because the kids fall into a natural rhythm.  Often parties that take place inside need to have organized games and a lot of parental supervision because children get more antsy when they are bottled up inside with many children and adults.

From urban to rural communities, you can reserve for a very low fee the use of a local park to host a party.  While you host your outdoor party, you may be introducing some families to the joys and benefits of spending time outdoors.

For the more adventurous crowd you could host a hiking party for little ones.  Have everyone show up in sneakers, with sunscreen and a water bottle.  After the children have finished exploring the trail, you can spread out the picnic lunch that you backpacked in.  The children can eat; you can read a story and head back to the trail head.  You could also have the children collect something like old sticks or pine cones and have them decorate them when you get back to the trail head.  Just before the children go home, offer them a whistle or small compass instead of a goody bag.

This kind of party requires little organization, no pre and post house cleaning, and costs very little.

Of course, if your child is born during cold winter months you may just want to build a snowman or snow shelter like a quinzee and offer hot chocolate.

Heidi

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